Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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