I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Randomize
