I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize