So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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