now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
