We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
