K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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