Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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