I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
