i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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