ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
