plz talk dirty to me
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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