Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize
