he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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