I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
