So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
