I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize