you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
