So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
