I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
