And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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