i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
