where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
