You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize