you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
