the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
