Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I DEMAND FORESKIN
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
