so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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