guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize