I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
