we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
