I'm passing your future prison.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
the raccoons are back...
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