Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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