Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
