I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I think people are normalizing furries
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
