STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
It's just like the Real World with babies
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
