you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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