I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
