You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize