I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize