I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
