i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
