I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
