Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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