i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
