How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize