i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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