I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Threesome in a minivan. New low
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
