im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Bring me that man meat
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
