I think i peed on brittanys purse
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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