She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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